Musings on the daily events in politics and sports as well as some local bar stops along the way in LA.

Tuesday, August 30, 2005

My journey to Armenia and Moscow day by day (entry no.3)

August 15
Have you ever looked at a map of Armenia? More importantly, have you ever seen the roads of Armenia? Then you’ll realize that driving to Artsakh (Mountainous Karabakh) with a stop in Ghapan couldn’t be any more inconvenient or out of the way. Then again they’re generally in the same direction, Ghapan is the fortress in the mountains and it’s the sister city of Glendale so screw it im game lets get this show on the road. Good thing we hit the road at 6am because we needed to get an early start if we wanted any shot of hitting Shoushi at a reasonable hour to get some sleep and get ready for our Artsakh adventures. On the way to Ghapan Shant busts out songbooks for everybody. 95% of the people weren’t too excited to see these songbooks, but the AYFers in the group were (all both of us). So the next hour or so we sing Sardarabad, Kedashen, Ayroonot Turosh and all the classics. Too bad almost nobody is singing along but at least everybody is having a good time listening and getting into it. Theres nothing like singing heghapokhagan songs on a 15 hour van ride to Artsakh… this is what its all about. I could go on and on about the bus ride but the bottom line was that it was a bus ride. Around 2pm, the time everyone expected us to be in Artsakh we finally make it to Ghapan. Almost everyone is bitching and is wondering what the hell are we doing in this random city in the middle of nowhere (ah but none of you are bitching now are you? Now that were back it seems like a great stop). So we get to ghapan and it’s a small town in the middle of the mountains with a trash filled river running through the middle. We quickly meet up with our tour guides who are going to lead us to some restaurant where we will feast with the mayor of Ghapan. Ghapan was an industrial town during the Soviet era, and as you know, the Soviet industry didn’t manufacture the total product in one city, that way all the Soviet states were dependant on each other. So when the commies collapsed, these industrial towns were hit the hardest because they now had factories that weren’t competitive in the market economy. So Ghapan was hit really hard as we will soon here from the mayor. We drive for like 20 min into the middle of nowhere in the mountains and everyone is wondering where the hell we’re going and what were doing here. We finally make it to some random shack in the middle of nowhere next to some river. This looks like the type of place Jimmy Hoffa could hide out in and there would be no way anyone would ever find him. We get there and theres a huge table set up for us that looks like it will soon contain a large cooked dead animal along with lots of Armenian sides. So while we wait for the food to cook and the mayor to arrive Sevag and I decide to play some bellotte with the Hayastantsi drivers. We start playing with each of us taking a hayastantsi on our team and Sevag gets yelled at for playing the jack when he called the atoo. In a ridiculous, no-one would have expected it type of strategy the locals are teaching us tricks that nobody in la would ever see coming (still waiting to use this one when I play in la). If I learned one thing on this trip it is that one crazy move that Sako yelled at my brother about. So the mayor gets there and we start feasting, theres food and vodka everywhere, more good times in Ghapan. The mayor makes all of us get up and say something about ourselves, some people went on longer than others and randomly people start cheersing each other and were all slowly getting drunk (what else is new in Armenia). The mayor gets up and says a long toast mentioning “vad dareeneruh” (the bad years) a lot. Looks like Ghapan was hit really hard right after the collapse of the Soviet Union. The mayor has also been drinking a shot on every single “genats” (cheers) that has gone around so he’s pretty tipsy right now. So what does he bust out?! “I have to go because I’m late to a meeting with some Japanese investors who want to build a tunnel (or something I don’t remember) in Ghapan.” What?! Crazy. The Japanese are known to be very tolerant of drunk mayors who show up late to the only investors who come into this random in the middle of nowhere city. Ah good times, I’d like to know how that meeting went. I’m guessing the Japanese expected as much but it was still funny to see. So after were done eating, one of the members of our group goes around and cleans up the river and all the trash that’s all over the place and when hes finally done he asks a local where the trash bin is and theyre response? The River! That’s classic Armenia right there, the Americans trying to do theyre American style recycling and stuff and the Armenians could care less. Needless to say he wasn’t too happy with the environmental situation of the country. So now we’ve been drinking, haven’t slept a wink in over 36 hours and were ready to head to Shoushi. The road to shoushi is very windy since its all mountainous. To travel 10 feet forward you have to travel 20 feet in driving roads because it is so windy, not to mention bumpy for a 15 person van. Everyone is nodding off but cant go to sleep cause its impossible to sleep in those situations when you’re an American used to comfortable Posture pedic mattresses. We finally make it to Shoushi around 9pm at night and its beautiful. It nestled at the top of the mountain at an incredibly high peak overlooking all of Artsakh. The hotel is in the middle of town right next to the church and central square. Lots of bombed out buildings and the roads suck due to landmines. I go exploring for a short amount of time to realize that I love this city. If you think were giving these lands back then ive got some beachfront property in Kansas im selling you because it looks like an impossible city to liberate but somehow we did it. I crash and pass out in the hotel at around 930 and get my first good nights sleep in a week. And its no coincidence that it happened in Shoushi.

Monday, August 29, 2005

My journey to Armenia and Moscow day by day (entry no.2)

August 13
I wake up around 2pm with nobody in my room cursing my brother for making it to the daily trip without waking me up. I slowly get out of bed and head downstairs for lunch at the Ani hotel restaurant. When I get downstairs I see Adela and Tamar who apparently realized that I wasn’t in my room at 630 in the morning last they checked when they took my brother home. They say there is no way he made it to the trip in the condition he was in. We head downstairs after breakfast and run into him and im relived now that I’m not the only one who missed Dzidzernagapert and we can just go another day. We head over to Shoushigs apt because apparently she’s living there for the summer. Her apt was the first glimpse I had into an Armenian apt and it was phat. I don’t know about the living conditions outside of Yerevan yet but inside they are just fine. I could totally live in a place like this. Rest of the day was spent walking around and getting to know the city, hit up Vernisage and a few other places, went to a café at night and took it easy after the ridiculous past few nights.

August 14
Wake up in the morning to go to Echmiadzin (the first church built in Armenia in 301 a.d., possibly the world but im not sure), its ridiculously hot outside so I decide to wear shorts. I go downstairs to see most people dressed much nicer than they were every other day and it hits me that it’s a Sunday and were going to church, so I decide to go upstairs and change into pants even though it’s a billion degrees outside. We head over to the sacred church and theres thousands of people there. What struck me right away was the size of the entire compound. It isn’t merely a church in a random city but it’s a seminary and a religious compound. There a bunch of priests and people studying theology walking all over the place. It puts your entire religion in perspective when you see all these people giving their lives to god. Usually I only see one priest or Srpazan at a time, here you see where they all study and train, it made me look at my religion a bit differently (still didn’t make me religious or anything just made me look at it differently). I walk inside the church and see what looks like a cult meeting since there are about 30 Srpazans praying and holding some sort of ceremony in their black robes and pointed hats. It was ridiculously packed in there and put together with the heat and the fact that they don’t shower or wear deodorant in Armenia, it was time to exit the premises. I wandered around the compound for a while and ran into a carnival of all things. Its funny to see the old Soviet carnival rides, theyre quite primitive and all made with a bunch of steel but the kids seemed quite happy riding the rides. It’s a good thing they cant afford to come to the US and go to magic mountain or something cause then they might get spoiled like us westerners and not be able to enjoy their communist era fun.
Next we were off to one of my most anticipated sites, Sardarabad. It was the site where the Armenians held off the Turkish bastard army and set some sort of groundwork for the borders of an independent Armenia back in 1918. There is a huge monument built that can be seen from miles away. The structure is built at the end of the road so as youre driving to it you can see it approaching dead center. You have to walk up the final couple hundred meters to get to the monument and you see it looming larger with each step. When we get to the monument our tour guide, Tatevos, starts explaining the story and battle of Sardarabad to the group. Everone is on edge listening to the tales of victory and when he talks about the actual monument and the victory bells that randomly go off, the bells at that moment started ringing and people jumped out of their seats and I got chills across my spine. What a moment. We then went into the Sardarabad museum which contained random stuff and we headed back to Yerevan.
On our way back to Yerevan we stopped at the ruins of Zvartnots, while they were random ruins what I noticed over there was the snack shop lady. It was about a million degrees every day and everywhere we went we bought bottles of water, we bought so many we kept selling the places out. There was nowhere else to buy water for miles yet they were still selling it at retail prices, well not at Zvartnots. Finally there was a capitalist in Armenia, she sold us water at double the cost and half the size and still sold out… that’s more like it.
We head back to Yerevan knowing that were leaving for Artsakh at 6am so what do we do? We go out drinking. After hearing our tall tales of gaseous alcohol consumption, some people in the group want to see what its all about so we head over to Hratch and Raffis bar and tell them we have more people for their drinks. As were walking up to the bar not only do they recognize Sevag and I, but the customers were the same and they recognized us too! We must have made more of an impact than we thought. So now theres about 6 of us drinking these gaseous drinks, and they start making more drinks that they set on fire. Around 3am we start heading back to the hotel while random people are staying out. I was at the hotel about 20 min when I decided that this is no way to be partying in Yerevan so I head back to the streets. As im leaving the hotel I randomly run into Ara and Sebouh who have been stuck in London because of the British airways sympathy strike. They look defeated and tell me to take them drinking since by now I must know somewhere good. So I take them to the gas bar and they start consuming gaseous drinks left and right .They are trashed in no time, next thing we know the other customers are starting to drink the gas drinks and it’s a big ol’ party. Local girls were dancing on the bar stools, aras telling stories about how much British airways sucks and how hes not gonna go to Artsakh cause he still doesn’t have his luggage and he got to Yerevan an hour ago. I part ways with them at 545 telling the bartenders I have to go to Artsakh, they tell me to visit them when I get back. I head back to the hotel as my brother is just getting in and getting ready to pack but I tell them Ara and Sebouh finally made it so we go back to the bar and take some shots with the faction, as we get to the bar ara is still telling stories and Sebouh is making out with some random local girl with braids who could or could not have been a prostitute. We once again part ways and its 6am, time to head over on a 15 hour van ride to ghapan then Artsakh. Windy dirt roads going off no sleep.
This is when the trip really begins.

Saturday, August 27, 2005

My journey to Armenia and Moscow day by day (entry no.1)

Tuesday August 9
Arrive in NYC for the night and decide to go out and party, to see what Tuesday night in NY has to offer. End up getting wasted and getting home at 5am thinking "New York is the greatest city in the world, the bars are packed and open past 4am on a random Tuesday night." Little did I know what was in store for me the coming two weeks.

August 10
Day of travelling, spent 11 hours in the Moscow airport trying to sleep on a cold communist marble floor. It sucked. Ended up landing in Yerevan at 4am and to my hotel room around 6am because we had to wait for some other peope in our group to arrive so we can get our ride to the Ani Hotel.

August 11
wake up at around 730 am and ready to see the city. Go downstairs to eat breakfast in the hotel and then walk the streets around the hotel to get a feel for the city before we start our official tour of Yerevan. We start off on our tour of Yerevan with the group. We have two vans taking us around town. Most people are complaining that its not a huge tour bus, but I could care less... I'm in YEREVAN who cares what I'm riding in. We go first to the new Soorp Krikor Loosavorich church in yerevan, which is huge but its pretty basic and has no markings or details, i'm not very impressed. Next we go to the Madenataran which is where all the old Armenian manuscripts are at. It contains the first bible translated into Armenian and a bunch of other stuff. Most of the stuff isnt that old because everything has either been left behind in historical Armenia or taken by the communists. Once again not that impressive, im starting to think "this is the Armenia i've been dreaming about? uh oh". Then everything changes. We're on our way to Khor Virab and Shant asks if we want to stop to get something to eat. Everyone says no lets just go get khor virab over with since its so hot, but Shant decides to stop anyway. We stop at a random shack in the middle of nowhere on the way to the Turkish border where the khor's at. A few people decide they want some khorovadz sanwiches and the owner says i'll just put a whole bunch on the fire and however wants it will get it. This old man comes out of the back and gets the bbq going with a mechanical fan that looked like it was straight out of some communist cache. He ends up making the best sandwiches and everyone gets one, this trip is starting to look up. Driving up to Khor virab you start to appreciate its beauty as its nestled up against the overbearing mountain of Ararat. It takes a small hike to get to it and its also one of the hottest places in all of Armenia. It was about a million degrees when we got there, but I was the first one down into the pit and it was very calmly cool in there. I wanted to meditate in there, but then I realized that I don’t meditate and I’m with a group whose on a schedule. I took a deep breath and thought to myself “this is what Hayastan is all about.” It was so much better than I ever imagined it would be, it was 25 degrees cooler in there and it felt like there was some spiritual being keeping you cool and sane even though you were in a giant pit. When we got back to the hotel everyone decided that we would meet at 9:00 in the lobby so we would go out. Sevag and I both passed out in the hotel room and didn’t make it to the 9pm meetup, even though we were woken up multiple times to go out. We ended up waking up around 1030 and knew that we had no way in contacting anybody from the group so we decided to drink the bottle of vodka we picked up from the Moscow airport and then figure it out. Once we cashed that bottle we headed over to the opera area since we heard there were a bunch of bars there. We saw an outdoor bar there that had a sign for Shark energy drink and decided to check out the Red Bull vodka of Armenia. As we were drinking that the bartender asked us if we wanted some cocaine. When he saw the hesitation in our faces he made it clear that cocaine was a drink that you can only get at that bar in all of Armenia. So we told him to make us a couple. The drink involved a shot of tequila and Malibu in one glass and contreau in the other. He lights up the contreau and then pours it into the other shot glass with a flame of fire following. He traps the gas from the fire in one glass while you take a shot of the liquid and then inhale the fumes in the other glass through a straw. Needless to say after that we were wasted so we headed over to the hrabarag (republic square) with 22’s of Kotayk. We ended up meeting a bunch of locals in the square and hanging out with them for a while. One thing led to another and we were singing verkerov li in memory of Garo who never made it to Armenia and Hovig who loved it when he did. We then decided that it was time to pick things up a bit and headed over to the club Atlantik. The rest of our group was randomly at the club and we partied with them. Everyone randomly split up after that and I ended wandering through the streets of Yerevan and got to the hotel around 730 in the morning after finishing a beer at some bar. There goes the theory that New York parties later than anywhere else. And along with it goes Day 1 in Yerevan, not a bad start to this journey.

I’ll continue tomorrow.

Thursday, August 18, 2005

If you havent been to Karabakh then you havent been to Armenia

Well I just got back from Karabakh, and thats exactly what I expected Armenia to be. While Yerevan is exactly like a European city, Karabakh is exactly what you expect from an Armenian city. We hit up Shoushi, Stepanagerd, Aghdam, Ashan, and a few other amazing spots. All of it was crazy. Also hit up Noravank on the way back which was another very serene and calming spot for a church.
I'd like to keep writing but theres too much to see and too much to do.

Saturday, August 13, 2005

Just one word about Armenia: Wow

So far this trip had been crazy. I dont have much time to go into details about everything but wow. First of all khor virab is probably the most serene and zen place ive ever been to in my life. I was the first one down there of my group and i was alone in there for about 2 min and it was crazy. I wanted to just be alone in there for an entire day it just seemed so peaceful. I didnt realize how spiritual of a trip this would be. While I knew that I didnt want to simply go out and get wasted every night like I usually do while on vaaction, I couldnt fathom the spiritual effect Hayastan was going to have one me. Although the nightlife is also crazy, I was up drinking until 6am on friday night. The bartender made this drink that involved him setting the drink on fire and then trapping the gas then putting a straw in the cup with the trapped gas and making me inhale the gas. Ridiculous.
Yerevan is like a European city and I no longer see any reason to hit up Europe (except for convenience) when theres Yerevan to go to.
I'd like to go into detail about everything but I have to go to Echmiadzin and then the one and only Sardarabad. Then I'm of to Artsakh tomorrow morning.

Peace,
Kristapor

Wednesday, August 03, 2005

Coming attractions

Just to let all you loyal readers know (I know there's one of you out there somewhere), I will be going to Armenia Next Tuesday. Thats right... I will be headed to the Motherland. The itinerary includes trips to Sardarabad and Dzidzernagapert by far #1 and 2 on my list. Then theres also khor virab, keghart and Artsakh. After that its all gravy. I know that most people have never heard of even a single one of those places but just know that theyre all the places ive wanted to go to all of my life and after 25 years i'm finally getting the chance. Theres a 50% chance that i get down on my knees and start crying when I see these historic sights and a 50% chance i wonder "what the hell is this crap? this is what i've been looking forward to my entire life?!" We'll well all see together as I will be updating this blog with my adventures in hayastan (depending on the computer access over there). So here's to shots of touti oghi and visions of ararat on the horizon.

genatsut